Circle Report - Run 1822
The Newlings 1st Wedd Ann Run
11/6/08
The Run
The international embargo having been lifted, UN sanctions removed, and NATO having stood down, Lock Road was finally back on the Harriett’s list of permissible run sites. Sneaky Comer loves dragging Wet ‘n Wild up that gully in Telok Blangah hill, so all was set for a lovely anniversary bust up. Sadly, Singapore business-men hadn’t gotten the memo, or perhaps had written their own ‘lah, and 10 minutes before 6 the landlord of Little Bali turned up and told the beer truck to piss off. Delicate negotiations ensued, a cease fire was negotiated, and the beer wagon moved 50m up the road; all despite a number of members trying to send a missile or two into negotiations. Please do note from now own that you must seek permission to use Lock Road car park well in advance. Check with the GM or on-sec.
So, finally, to the run. A hot and bothered Sneaky Comer read out a long list of instructions, followed by “we won’t be sweeping the run”. Dangerous tactics indeed given the near impossibility of solving some of the checks. Left to their own devices, Harriets proceeded to run to Henderson Waves for reasons known only to themselves (apparently a run set in 1997 left trail heading up there); finally found their way up the gully to the top of Telok Blangah; fell down the steep slope to Depot Road cutting the top of Goody Bag’s head off in the process, mulled over a tricky check for 20 minutes or so, and finally ended up at Alexandria Hospital at 6:50 where the real run was supposed to start. At this point the hares wisely cut off the rest of the run and we were on home over the Alexandria marvel of modern engineering (no doubt the highest bridge within 50 metres).
Circle Report
What did we think of the run? Apart from “those checks were harder than the Times crossword” from Wet Pet, all I could hear was “run of the year” (there is an advantage in scribing your own run).
Next Week’s Run:
Pants Alone’s farewell run, co-hared by Wet N Ready. Changi Village Car Park, on on at Millies.
Virgins:
Graham, Reece, and Pip all claimed to be virgins.
New Member:
Graham clearly enjoyed having his cherry popped by the Harriets. Will it be as good next time?
Visitors:
Stiff, Slip n Slide, Knobby Boy Scout, Wet Patch.
Returnees:
Posh Duck, Mouth Full, Woodbridge – welcome back and please join us again.
The Tits:
Not Tonight was proudly wearing the tits all through the circle (others take note please). Further, she was also proud to say that she had been felt up by more women than men. But most of all, Not Tonight was pleased that plenty of potential tits showed up on the run:
- Shag managed to step onto the road right into the path of a poor old Uncle on a motorbike. What happened to the Uncle is unclear but there was a definite wobble going on as Not Tonight turned her attention to
- Wet Patch, who has no excuse for not noticing the humongous bus that he stepped in front of; particularly since he was short cutting through a bus lay-by at the time.
- Bizzie Bush, who obviously didn’t pay attention to the look right, then left, then right before crossing the road taught in kindergarten. Unfortunately she just looked right before crossing against a red light, exactly the wrong direction for cars speeding down the slip road to the AYE.
- For good measure, Sneaky Comer was charged with setting dangerous road crossings for people who clearly can’t cross the road without their mothers.
The Dick: missing in action.
Lipstick:
Wet Patch, Boo, and Sneaky Comer (who just likes being kissed by Kamala) were the naughty boys this week.
Any Other Business
Sneaky Comer did an incomprehensible explanation of where the run should have gone, explained that he didn’t learn his lesson last year, and finally gave himself a charge for being inconsiderate to his co-hare.
Mother’s Tongue had a complicated mathematically based charge that by this time I was having a bit of trouble following since I forgot my calculator. Anyway, all the married couples were invited in for a drink, followed by all the divorced people. Since there were more married than divorced, they are happier, I think. Good on them, but what about those of us who had to drink twice and then remember what the charge was about?
Wet Pet pointed out that while most hashers are proud of their hash names, sometimes you shouldn’t really flaunt it. Not Good Enough returned to the run site really flaunting it (having torn his shorts), but mate, it really isn’t good enough.
Zipp has a related charge, and calls in Give Way who was overhead saying she likes them long. And yet here we have flaunted evidence that it is not good enough!
Tiger Lilly has noticed Michael carrying his bag in the circle – he might be a virgin member but he needs to know he can leave his bag somewhere.
Hand Bag thinks Sneaky Comer’s charge on himself a little earlier had only one objective, to ensure he was going to get one tonight. Give him a note for being a suck up.
Not Good Enough wants to see our virgin/new member Graham in the circle. Graham is starting to reconsider this joining the hash business. Anyway, NGE had overhead a bit of a conversation earlier, with Wet Pet and Octopussy. Apparently Graham really enjoyed his run, he felt it was like “Running with Dogs”. He might be a new member, but we can’t let a hash name like that go past and forever more Graham is Running with Dogs.
The circle, due to our earlier issues, was on a patch of pavement behind a chain. Most people managed to negotiate the chain but not Shoe Shopper, who was charged with vanity because she should be wearing glasses by Stiff.
As if the scribe didn’t already have enough trouble focusing, Kamala had Wet ‘n Wild and Sneaky Comer in for another anniversary drink.
Knobby Boy Scout needs some counseling, apparently. Who can give him such counseling? Well we have Not Tonight, who has psychological skills. We have Mother’s Tongue, who has medical skills. And we have Goody Bag, who has skills. What does he need counseling for? Well apparently he has to retire his long loved hash shoes. And what sort of counseling does he decide on? Come on, guess, it isn’t that hard. Give the counselors a note.
Tiger Lilly is in to tell a tale out of school. Normally, Twin Towers is needing a snack before the run. Today, however, apparently the two had lunch together and it was so filling that TT couldn’t finish her banana dessert. Give self satisfied a note.
On On to Bali Seafood Restaurant.
Scribed by Sneaky Comer.