Circle Report - Run 1832
Run # 1832,
Danec With Kerbs and Sybil
McKenzie Road
The Run
Well, we have all heard of Pepsi with a twist, this was the Hash with a twist! Dances with Kerbs tells us to form ability groups (this was actually a big test of ability in itself, getting 40 hashers to form an ability group? Really, a task well beyond their ability) Maps were then handed out, 1 per group, and runners set out in small groups based on no logical basis at all. (It may have been based on drinking ability now that I look at it) The maps contained directional instructions of the cryptic kind along with photos that would keep hashers on trail. It is interesting to note that neither Tiger Lily, Shaggy Dick 2 nor Shoe Shopper were trusted with one of the limited maps. In fact, very few females were entrusted with a map. Strange that. Through the buses and a romp in the hay, the front group soon did a loop of the old school road and out again to join the rest of the pack. It was then down a set of the steepest steps I have ever seen in my life. The pretty young Singapore girl sitting on the bottom step doing a bit of study would never have endangered her life if she knew that there were 40 uncoordinated retards descending on her, some with size 12 runners trying to get their footing on Chinese size 2 steps, as well as some survivors from the Hash challenge who had absolutely no control on their withered and depleted thigh muscles. Anyway, pretty study girl survived and probably will pick up a high distinction on the case study she was writing for her psychology exam entitled � what makes fools dressed in ridiculous clothing run through the streets shouting out �on on�. Plenty of material there for her. Security at the Mrt were given a wake up as the runners passed through, down under and up again. Kan Not Can ran straight into the hotel lobby for some air con cooling before being evicted, while others were singing � Ella, Ella, under my umbrella� and it was onto the red brick road. It may as well have been the psychedelic brick road to Tiger Lily who simply kept running straight and missed the turn off. Into Fort Canning Park, make sure you keep the Battle box on your left Stiffy. Past the Cannons, what a blast, through the arch and find the lighthouse. A bit of spicy stuff (I�m not spicy, I�m hot said one female hasher!) and out of the park. Then things got a bit tricky. Females with maps, especially the blondes, turned them upside down, to the side, turned them over, showed them to foreign tourists for help, spat on them ( the maps that is, not the tourists) and generally cursed in an effort to work out where they were. Anyway, using our maps, and after we found another red brick road, along with a clock, an arch, a snake charmer, Indian cricket player, look a like taj mahal, a group of Bollywood dancers, 3 Girls from Desker Road, and a curious construction worker, we all made it home. Well done Hares, for something completely different!
What did we think of the run?
No doubt this was a good run. A lot of effort was put in by the Hares and it was appreciated by everyone.
On On;
�The Eye Of a Needle� Indian in Racecourse Rd
Next week;
Virginia Slim tells us he has no f**king idea where the run will be next week.
Visitors:
Pussy Lifter, Cherry Picker, Armless (a German invasion?) Phoney Dick and Shiggy Piggy�s friend.
Returnees;
Shuttlecock (member of the �Cock� Family?), Lethal Weapon, Legaless and Stiff because he was too busy talking and missed the visitors.
At this stage, someone mentioned that guests are $20 so Virginia Slim says he�ll have 2. Personally, I think I�ll wait till someone says that virgins are $20 and put in for a dozen!
Awards:
Slowcum has run 300 times with the Harriet�s, well done. �Slowcum has never run �quips a witty person. Instead of an award, Slowcum donates the money to the Breast awareness, I mean the Breast Cancer Awareness foundation. Well done Slowcum, good to see you thinking of breasts.
The Tits:
We have the old and the new. The old saggy ones are worn by Boo who got them from Malfunction who finally gave them up. It is important to save water, it is a precious commodity proclaims Boo, so how come when he offered two scantily clad Harriet�s to shower with him they refused, thus wasting lots of valuable water unnecessarily. In you come Big Head and Lethal Weapon, next time shower with a friend! And who is more deserving of the tits? Lethal Weapon gets the nod.
Next in are the Boob job Tits, modeled by Cock Radio. Keeping with the shower theme, it seems there is a certain male who spends considerable time around the back every week showering with the girls. We all know that girls spend a lot of time in the bathroom but Kan Not Can beats them all. And he doesn�t stop talking either. If you are going to shower like the girls Kan Not Can, then you need some Tits.
There is a pause while Kan Not Can, with his new Tits out, poses Playboy style for the camera. Really, next he�ll be squatting to have a pee!
The Dick:
Comes Quietly brings in 3 groups;
- The visually challenged group. The Hares are asked what is the average age of the Hash? 75! So how are they expected to read the instructions on the map!
- The sexually challenged group. Kan Not Can, Cherry Picker and Hand Bag who came back without a woman in their group.
- The Hash challenged group. Those that consider a 1 hour run not sufficient and set out on a 12 hour run in Malaysia instead. Shoe Shopper, Shaggy Dick 2, Tiger Lily, Wet Patch, In and Out. Now go get a life will you!
AOB
- The GM calls in Armless and Virginia Slim for running in front of the women. The fact that they both arrived at 7.30 from work and didn�t even run is irrelevant. Good charge! But perhaps the GM needs another drink too.
- The Lipstick somehow has been relegated to AOB tonight. Of course the Sexually Challenged group is in, along with Armless and Slim who are still protesting their innocence, and Shaggy Dick 2 is thrown in for good measure. Sybil and Goody Bags give them the royal lipstick treatment and Armless claims that shaggy had his tongue out when he got his!
- Shut the F**k Up brings everyone to silence. Sybil was in bed Sunday night��.no more details please, stop! She was awoken by a phone call �Kamala, can you do a recce with me tomorrow?
�I have an appointment in morning lah�
�Ok, then we go at 12.30�
�But so hot then lah, so much sun, I go very dark, not much sunscreen left�
�Then you better wear a hat�
�I only got one hat�
�What you wear then?�
And so the conversation went on and on, and somewhere in it all was an architect connection but I missed the connection. On in Dances With Kerbs for making Kamala dark. - Open Wider tells of some bad press that the Brits have been getting and of course the poor taste jokes that Blondes have to suffer everyday. So she proudly tells us that 3 blonde English girls won their boat rowing race. Well done blondes, Rule Britannia!
- A few of the boys have been thinking about that last bit of boasting, something just doesn�t seem right. There is the rowing pairs, the coxless 4�s, the rowing 8�s but a crew of 3? We don�t think so. Was it the pairs with an extra crew member or was it the 4�s that lost someone overboard?
- Lethal Weapon is not happy with her saggy tits, I think she has been eying off the firm boob job new ones. Anyway, a Harriet had come up behind her on the run and said �I know that bum!� in you come Shoe Shopper, bet you say that to all the girls! Anyway, Lethal Weapon gives her a pat on the bum and promptly gives her the tits seeing that she enjoys viewing female body parts (don�t we all?)
- Stiff was at Fort Canning Park looking at the drinking pool and fountain for clues. Which way should he go now? He wonders over to Twin Towers who is also just standing still wondering where to go. Stiff looks down at the ground where Twin Towers is standing and notices something rather useful. Umm, Twin Towers, I think we should go the way that chalk arrow between your feet is pointing. Give blonde moment a note!
- Slowcum recalls the instruction that clearly stated to keep the Battle Box on your left. So as soon as Stiffy got to the Battle Box, what did he do? Yes, of course, he turned right, thus putting the Battle Box on his right. Another blonde moment!!
- Not Tonight comes in to verify that Stiffy in his younger days had shoulder length very blonde hair, thus proving that the last charge really was a blonde moment.
- Kan Not Can overheard Tiger Lily on the steep steps saying that this was very hard (what was very hard �Kan Not Can?). no, the steps were hard, it was like a mini hash challenge! She then proceeded to poach his clues. Don�t worry Kan Not Can, she still got lost!
- Suzee Wong tells us that after coming 1st in the Hash challenge, Tiger Lily went straight out and did the normal Hash. Tough or just plain stupid?
- Not Tonight said that Shoe Shopper was so sore Monday she had to take the day off work, so she limped (staggered, crawled?) into the doctor�s to get an MC for the day. However, the doctor took one look at her and promptly gave her the rest of the week of. (Note: Shopper, being the brave little trooper she is was back at work the next day!)
- Don�t forget the Red Dress Run coming up in September, see Jack Off for registration.
- And don�t forget the Breast Cancer Awareness Run coming up soon.
Scribed by Cock Radio