Circle Report - Run 1857
Aussie Day Run
Heavy Vehicle Pac @ Corner of Jurong Road & Bt Batok Road
Now just why wouldn�t the locals want to have their Chinese New Year Run this week? Because they knew there wouldn�t be a Chinese restaurant in the whole of Singapore open for the On On! So it was up to the Aussies to show the way. Arriving at the car park, the Greasy Spoon was a hive of action with workers renovating the place, no chance of being open tonight anyway. Let�s set the run, worry about food later! A good size pack assembled to sweat off some CNY festivities. Despite the first Circle Check being in the same location as a recent Sunday run here, Tiger Lily was still totally confused, went the wrong way and went the wrong side of the stream. Shopper remembered the way but a long T check soon had her brought back to reality too. Along some nice bush trails, lots of Circles and long checks kept the pack together nicely. Heading up towards the canal, a nice long loop with an even longer T check allowed the walkers to take a significant short cut and get out onto the road to head for home before there was any sign of the pack. Meanwhile, the FRB�s, who had found another T check, went back the wrong way and ended up at the start of the loop they had just completed. Beautiful!! Well done Hares. Eventually it was out onto Bukit Batok Rd via a slippery embankment in front of a sign saying �Danger keep out.� A fast hit out for home and runners and walkers all finished within 5 minutes of each other. Good run!
On On:
Mmm, who�s for pizza? Yes, after eating non stop Chinese food over the CNY long weekend, Slowcum reckons Pizza is a great idea, food problem solved.
Visitors & Returnees;
Aye Aye, Saliva, Naval Dick, Sex Change, C**ntfused, Suzanne, Loren, Dirty Foot, In and Out, Malfunktion, Chris, Janice.
Lipstick:
It seems the Monday men may be using the lippy tonight.
The Tits:
Tiger Lily enters the Circle with her tits in her hand, which always does something to the boys when a girl does that! This causes In and Out to break into song, �Put your tits on for the boys,� and she does. Twin Towers and Legaless are brought in by Tiger and the Circle is asked what do these 2 have in common for a charge. �One has tits already!� shouts Shoe Shopper. And so Legaless wins for not having tits yet.
The Dick:
Jack Off forgot to bring the Dick, again. Jack Off was then questioned about this week�s lack of information regarding the run. �I sent it out last week, I swear.� She protests innocently. Yeah, sure! May as well keep the Dick anyway!
AOB?
- Knobby Boy Scout requires 1 white man about 180cm tall, Stiffy will do. Also 1 Japanese looking lady, thanks Dances With Kerbs. And finally an almost good lawyer to defend them, Boo. It seems that a couple answering the above description were seen walking through Holland Village last Saturday night. It takes balls to do that, or tits too I guess! How do you plead? Insanity your Honour.
- Shoe Shopper needs a Bloodshit look a like so grabs Knobby Boy Scout. Talking to Bloodshit after the run, she commented that it was nice having a long weekend and wouldn�t it be nice to work 4 days and have 3 days off all the time. Bloodshit reply was that it would be even nicer to work 2 days and have 4 days off. Sounds good, but Bloodshit, what are you going to do on the other day of the week, is it an emergency day???
- Slowcum recalls that last Friday Shoe Shopper forgot to bring her thongs (flip flops) and had to borrow a pair. Did she return them tonight? No. But not only that, she forgot hers AGAIN tonight, and was asking to borrow yet another pair. Shoe Shopper????
- Sneaky Comer rang Cock Radio yesterday to see about another recce. �No, we don�t want to use up � our day off to go all the way to Jurong, she�ll be right! After all, we are Aussies and everything�ll be alright mate! What about the food? We�ll order that at the Greasy Spoon when we get there, no worries, she�ll be right mate. And just why was CR in such a carefree mood? Allegedly he had spent Monday celebrating Australia Day at the Aussie Bar in Orchard Towers and was a bit incapable of doing a recce the next day!
- Dances With Kerbs has noticed the bag that Tiger Lily brought the Tits along in. A nice big plastic bag with Mickey Mouse on it. Did the Tits belong to Minnie Mouse?
- Tiger Lily noticed Dirty Foot greeting people with Gong Xi Fa Cai, which was a nice gesture except that he also greeted Kan The Cobra with it as well. Has she converted over????
- Slowcum was looking forward to a nice quiet, restful long weekend but one Hasher kept pestering him everyday. Where�s the run? Who are the Hares? What about the mail out? Well done Stiffy. And he was still at it Wednesday lunch time until Jack Off got jack off it and told him to �Shut the F**ck up!�
- There has been little rain recently so therefore very little shiggy. But Jack Off noticed Dirty Foot at the first check managing to put one foot in mud that went over his knee. But apparently Big Foot never had a Hash name and decided to name himself at that point. Well, we can�t have you giving yourself a nice name like Dirty Foot. And the GM promptly and officially names him, and Black Member is how he will now be known! And you can�t wash that one off!
- Sneaky Comer mentions that not only is Australia in drought, but also Singapore. Black Member did exceedingly well to find the only bit of shiggy mud in all of Singapore.
- Cock Radio is puzzled as to why there is no Hash Lantern tonight? And how come we have Beer Wagon B? Where is Wagon 2 and Croc Hunter and Basket Case? And why is Kan the Cobra here but no Kan Not Can?? Boo, can you help us out with an answer? Oh, the Monday men moved their run from Monday to Wednesday because of CNY. And Kan Not Kan decided to run with them, as did Croc and Basket. They�re the meanest,��
- The 2 regular Beer boys still managed to receive a red packet from us however, despite tonight�s indiscretion! $2.50 each aint bad!
- Slowcum gets the Aussies in and asks what is the day all about. CR gives a perfectly correct answer about the First Fleet of convicts arriving at Sydney Cove, Jan 26 1788, but not convinced he seeks another answer. Unfortunately Comes Quietly offers a ridiculously incorrect answer, thus proving in Slowcum's mind that the Aussies have no idea what they are celebrating. Just remember though that Comes Quietly is from Tasmania however, thus his answer lacks some credibility!
- Sneaky Comer has realized there is no lip stick tonight. The question is asked, did the Monday Boys take it as well??
- Tiger Lily received complaints from 2 men for going the wrong way. Knobby Boy Scout and friend, you should know it�s Tiger Lily, no one will listen to yet another complaint against her for going the wrong way.
- Hooray charges Cock Radio for letting Singaporn wonder off from the Sunday Aussie Day Run Circle and fall down a drain, thus breaking a bone in her foot. Sorry Singaporn, but I told you to stay for the On On!
- Jack Off reminds us of the 2 runs being held tonight and the dilemma some men faced on which run to go to. Well done those men here tonight, but where is Kan Not Can?
- It is expected that when a road sign says �Turn left at anytime,� then you may proceed even if the light for going straight on is red. So Jack Off was most annoyed when driving that the car in front of her refused to turn left, despite the information clearly stated on the sign. Honk Honk! Come on, go, go will you! Wait a moment; they look like 2 Hashers in the car that is refusing to go. Sex Change and C**ntfusion, you ought to be publicly pissed on.
- Tiger Lily calls in OnHerRear and immediately there was a huge explosion and sparks going everywhere, causing the scribe to jump 3 metres out of his seat and take cover under the beer wagon. Eventually on seeing that there are fireworks to celebrate CNY and it wasn�t a terrorist plot to blow up the Hash, I returned to my seat and Tiger Lily proceeded. As last Sunday was CNY Eve, of course all good Chinese would be at home with family for the Reunion Dinner. Of course they would. But how come OnHerRear was seen at the Robbie Burns Memorial Run Sunday night. Shame on you, ditching your family for the Hash!
On on on.
Scribed by Cock Radio