Circle Report #1897
28th October 2009Shoe Shopper and Wet Patch
The Far Canal Run
Mt. Sinai Rise Rd - one of them anyway
The Run
Arriving at what we thought was the general proximity of the run site, we were confronted by a gaggle of confused runners looking for the actual site. Eventually we found the beer truck parked on the side of the road with people standing around it. Here we are, we thought. Oh no we’re not, we soon discovered. The Beer Wagon was lost and had given up, and was simply a magnet for lost runners. Eventually the Hares sent out a search party and rescued the lost souls. Even more importantly, the Beer Wagon was rescued.
Along the canal we set off, Shopper in the lead and Wet Patch up the rear. Detours off the canal and through the back streets, well positioned T Checks up narrow lane ways, ankle breaking ground, winging from Stiffy, a good looking Japanese girl on her HP, Fat Crashing Bastard making a serious attempt to keep up with Tiger Lily, were all highlights of the first part of the run that kept the pack together superbly.
The 2nd half commenced with a descent down into the canal. While the local Singaporean joggers, decked out in their spotless $300 Reeboks and latest model Nike running singlet, plodded along the lovely tree lined, purpose built running /cycling track, we plebs, attired in an assortment of motley rags and old muddy runners with our toes sticking through the ends made our way 10 metres below them on a slippery, slimy concrete concourse designed to dispose of storm water and any other undesirable liquid that happens to flow into it. Come to think of it, there were a few undesirable humans that could have been disposed off down here, but unfortunately Boo wasn’t running tonight. And we missed our chance with Stiffy.
Anyway, back to the run. Along the slippery, slimy canal and through a long, divided tunnel under a road, where the trail immediately did a 180 degree u turn and came back through the other side of the tunnel. This allowed runners still coming down the other way to splash/jump their way across the water and join the front runners. Good stuff Hares, well done.
Making our way out of the canal, we soon joined the locals for a hit out along the nice running/cycling track, but not for long as we we diverged up the grass embankment for a bit of jungle running. But soon again, there it was, and the call of ‘Far canal,’ was heard as we descended down the grass embankment to the canal pathway. I don’t know what it is about steep, slippery, grassy descents, but I always seem to end up with the Human Bowling Ball, Comes Quietly, who gets a kick out of taking a running jump onto his bum and sliding down out of control, taking out as many cautious hashers as he can.
Along the canal track but soon back up the slope into the jungle again. At this stage, Shoe Shopper has broken every check, not a bad effort for a Hare. Meanwhile, Wet Patch who is sweeping, has had enough of waiting for Slippery Bum and Mother Tongue and directs them to take a short cut home. Through the jungle and out onto Commonwealth Ave for a hit out before heading back into the jungle. At this point, Shoe Shopper made a world record attempt at breaking the most checks on a run while being a Hare. Unfortunately she fails and gets the Pack lost in the dark, dark jungle. Oh dear. Shame about that.
With no thanks to Shopper, the Pack found trail and continued on, through jungle and even some Shiggy before emerging at Clementi Rd. , then for a hit out along the canal track to home in around the hour mark.
Crikey, What did we think of that for a run? The fact that Boo wasn’t there immediately elevates the status of this run. Despite the calls of it being too sunny (the sun had not been seen all day) and Fat Crashing Bastard’s call of ‘Too Draining,’ there is no doubt that this was a bloody good run. Even if the hare failed to break the world record on breaking the most checks as a hare.
Tell us about your on on mate. BBQ mate, back at the house, there will be 4 checks on the way. BBQ and Beer, $10. (Great on on, well attended and good stuff)
Well what about next week? Halloween Run, organized by the men, which means it will be good. Fort Canning Park, car park just under Legends. DRESS UP SCARY.
Virgins, visitors, returnees and other misfits: Knee Trembler, Trash (Iris), Mike, Saori, Slimie Limie, Malfunktion, Jen, Posh Duck, Krit and probably a few others.
New Member – no
Lippy – Cock Radio, Slimie Limie and Kan Not Can.
The Dick – Lack of Dick again.
The Tits – No Tits
Awards - nah, don’t think so.
AOB –
· Even though the run site was a little difficult to find, Sneaky Comer tells us that it had one redeeming feature, it was at the end of a down hill slope. This conveniently allowed Malfunktion to roll his car silently down the hill and park next to the Beer Wagon, as he had run out of petrol while driving around looking for the run site.
· Jack Off informs us that there are only 8 tickets left for the Lion City D&D this coming Saturday.
· Legoless was leading the way through the jungle on a single file trail, when Tiger Lily, who was behind her, informed her that she had was bleeding on the back of her leg. Legoless cautiously pulled over to the side to examine her wound, only to find nothing, not the slightest scratch or drop of blood. Meanwhile, Tiger Lily had overtaken her and disappeared ahead.. Nice overtaking tactic Tiger!
· Hand Bag informs us that Slimie Limie is a very dedicated Hasher. At the Tokoyo Hash, he shaved his head, leaving a Hash footprint and the words ‘On On’ embedded on his cranium.
· Tiger Lily brought along a Japanese lady tonight, who in turn brought along a Japanese friend, who she said was her friend ---- for a week. Seems like the Japanese only form short term friendships!
· Shaggy Dick 2 was reading today’s newspaper, the free one of course, and came across an article about a primary school teacher who jabbed students with a syringe to discpline them. So all the primary school teachers are brought in for an ID parade. Wet N Wild, Lethal Weapon, Shoe Shopper and Cock Radio. This seemed a bit of a set up to me, as the Circle was then asked who the biggest prick was. Of course yours truly won hands down.
· Cock Radio has discovered why Singapore needs to find new sources of water supplies. Tiger Lily, who doesn’t really have a massive body/skin area, manages to use no less than 12 bottles of water to wash with after the run. When pressed on this, her comment was ‘But I have such big boobs, I need 3 bottles for each one.’ Which immediately drew a response from Shaggy Dick 2, ‘Right, and the other 6 bottles must be for your big asse.’ Give the water conservation gal a note.
· Stiffy starts this charge with a warning that all people likely to be offended should leave the Circle now. On the run, Stiffy commented that Wet Patch probably brought the dog along to set the run. Comes Quietly told Stiffy that he shouldn’t talk about Shoe Shopper like that. So was any one offended by all this? Not in the slightest said Shopper, in fact that is 1 place less required at the On On as Stiffy was no longer invited!! (He went anyway!)
· Cock Radio informs everyone of the attributes of the IB program, and Stiffy, based on his last charge, receives a special award for being such a Risk Taker. Actually, you can see there is a fine line between being a Risk Taker and being just plain stupid!
· Sneaky Comer remembers getting whacked by a cane at school, but at least the teacher always gave a warning it was coming. Tonight he got a ‘Swingback’ warning 20 seconds after he had been whacked by a branch.
· Hooray informs us that Malfunktion was born in the Shetlands and then moved to Liverpool. Why Liverpool? A UK survey found that girls from Liverpool have the biggest breasts. Has Mal confirmed this?
· Suzee Wong still has a few breast cancer awareness tops left, thanks to sponsors and donations. $2000 raised, well done.
· Fees are now OVERDUE, so cough up IMMEDIATELY.
On on On on to the house. Scribed by Cock Radio.