The ‘Just a Short Trot in the Virgin’ Run
Hare: Tiger Lily
Where: Bukit Gombak Stadium.
On On: Blooie’s Railway Mall
The Circle: The GM called the circle to order at 2005 hrs & invited the sole Hare in.
Crikey, so what did we think of that for a run? The run was announced beforehand by TL as an 8km runner’s run (what else were we expecting from the female Billy Whizz?). It turned out to be more like 9.5km. Still after a bit of well deserved abuse & sarcastic cries of ‘too short’ it was deemed a good run.
Tell us about your On On: On on at Bluey’s at Rail Mall.
Next week’s run: Next in Comes Quietly to announce Shoe Shopper & Wet Patch next run at Blackmore Drive. Let’s hope it’s only 8km!
Visitors / Returnees: Returnees & Guests got a bit mixed up by the GM, but that’s only to be expected from a woman who cannot make up her mind what colour her hair is (more later). So this mixed bunch was, Nutcracker, Welsh Git, Woodbridge, Strap On and Mouthful. Here’s to….
Virgins: Nope
The circle was next interrupted by a bus which wanted to drive right through us but Stiffy remonstrated that the driver was disobeying a no entry sign & he duly turned right almost wiping out 4 hash cars. Good one Stiffy!
Tits: Loose Change is in with tits borrowed from Cock Radio (now that’s a troubling mental picture). Turns out CR said she must give them to Stiffy. He is not happy about it & instead starts to abuse the GM and calling her badger head (note for next week GM he also said to me on the run that he had seen better looking badgers).
The GM quickly gets Jack Off for further GM hair abuse by saying that the GM looked like Saliva. Jack Off…You’re the meanest. And remember Stiffy, the GM is always right.
Dick: on holidays in the UK with Stiff?
Awards – nope.
Lippy: The GM forgot the lipstick AGAIN & had to race off to her car.
AOB Part 1 (while the GM is off getting her lippy on):
· Not tonight & Slowcum were walking together when Slocum was heard to say ‘I guess we’re going up the backside’. So that’s why you are walking like that!
· Visitor Strap On brought all the trail wetters in for marking their territory.
· TL calls in Hooray for complaining, being boring & short cutting. Tell it like it is eh Tiger?
Lippy: The GM is back with lipstick & Hooray (of course), Gypsy & Stephanne look alike Comes Quietly all get the treatment, though I could not quite see what CQ was doing but the GM told him to stop being so rude.
AOB Part 2:
· Gypsy was called in by the GM for A) Nominating Handbag for scribe duties but also B) Getting my name wrong & calling me Handjob. What a Bars#$$d.
· It must be time to put the boot into Handbag (now you English teachers will have a name for an expression like that) as Tiger Lily is complaining about my tone deaf singing putting her off her note.
· The singing was poor. I was just trying to make some noise. So time for revenge on TL so I call her in to talk about the run. It was commented that TL did not come directly back to the runsite (choosing to go home & shower first) because she thought it best to let the exhausted hashers calm down & relax with a few beers before they vented their spleen on her. I did comment to a couple of people I passed going up the staircase to the top of Lorong Sesuai that the woman was a complete sadist. She’s the meanest.
· The GM has Hooray in and says he only gave her shower water because TL had gone home to shower. Yes, he’s the meanest.
· There was more talk of Badgers & Snow Whites, but somebody commented ‘at least they have hair’, to which Gypsy piped up, ‘that’s not funny’.
· CQ has TL in for telling the pack when they had missed a well marked right turn ‘come on guys, can’t you see the trail?’. Japanese sarcasm at its best!
· Strap On calls in the GM for some charge to which Stiffy comments, ‘stop badgering the GM’.
· The GM gets Welsh Git in to sing us a Christmas Carol, Stiffy joins him & suggests ‘Watership Down’. Question? Since when did a song about rabbits dying from myxametosis become a Christmas Carol Stiffy? Luckily we got ‘O come all ye faithful’ instead.
· Handbag had visiting German pervert Strap On in for Frankfurt airport duty free having a sex shop
· then Zipp confessed to giving CQ the GM’s champagne by mistake as a down down, and when CQ complained she told him not to tell her!’ Another ‘O come all ye faithful’.
· Jack Off was hauled in by the GM for trying to end the circle by calling onon, and with a stirring rendition of ‘We wish you a merry Christmas’ the GM called onon.
Circle closed at 2040 hours.
On on on.
Scribed by Handbag.