The F#*king Easy Run
Lower Pierce Reservoir, car park off Thompson Rd
Hares: Goes Down Easy, F#*king Easy
On On: Thumbs Up Chinese Restaurant, Casuarina Road
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The Run:
Arriving extremely early at the run site (4pm), I decided to venture out alone for a run through Bishan Park, where I discovered a T Check not far inside the park. So after I finished my run, I located myself at a strategic vantage point beyond some bushes after the T to observe the pack.
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In a rare occurrence, it was Not Good Enough who broke the Check. There he was, standing alone on the other side of Ang Mo Kio Ave 1 calling for a woman. No one believed that he could actually break a Check, so he stood there for quite some time before other runners were convinced that he wasn’t joking.
From there, it looked like a horse race as the spread out pack made its way down the straight before turning up the grass hill.
Taking an early lead was Two Jugs, closely followed by Give Way, Comes Quietly, Forced Entry and Sneaky Comer. Obviously it was a weight for age race, as the combined age of this pack, 345 years, equaled their combined weight.
Fortunately they avoided a collision with a run away, Boo, who was coming from the opposite direction.
The leading bunch were followed by Give Way and Wet ‘n Wild who should have been muzzled to stop them chatting.
Trotting behind them was Red Snapper and Mother’s Tongue. Bagless Too and Bugle Boy got away to a poor start, going the wrong way at the T, and were trying to make up ground, quickly overtaking Loose Change, Not Tonight and Suzee Wong. Hooray was running his normal race tucked in midfield, looking for short cut options at the earliest possibility.
Imperfect Member and Mother’s Tongue, urged on by the Hare, Goes Down Easy, were plodding on steadily but being stayers rather than sprinters, found the fast straight was not to their liking.
As the field took the turn, Stiffy baulked at the sight of the imposing grassy hill climb that confronted them. Coming to a complete stop, he watched and thought carefully before turning back the opposite way and looking for easier options.
Meanwhile, the sprinter Too Easy, found it anything but too easy as she tried to cross the busy 4 lanes of Avenue 1, having failed to make the traffic lights.
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As the Pack made its way through suburbia before eventually crossing Upper Thompson Rd and finishing along the boardwalk trail next to the reservoir, I made my way back to the run site to shower, have a cold beer and watch the Pack fight it out to the finishing line.
Good race.
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The Circle:
After Not Good Enough shared his home made cookies, we were treated to a Circle led by 2 stand in Gm’s, Wet ‘n Wild and Two Jugs. Not Good Enough comments ’2 GM’s and ½ the IQ.’
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Crikey, so what did we think of that for a run? A good run. Loved the flying squirrel too.
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Tell us about your On On: Thumbs Up, next to Casuarina. And what a feast it was. The food (meat) kept coming and coming. Just when we thought we had finished, and we had wiped up, out came the lemon chicken.
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Next week’s run: Wet ‘n Wild calls for next week’s Hares. When no one came in, she finally remembered that she is next week’s Hare. [Actually, we are hoping the hare, Cunnilicker, remembers he is setting the run. According to the hareline, revealed by Sneaky Comer, the run may be at Lorong Sesuai].
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Guests: Pepe, Bugle Boy, Bagless Too, 14 Penguins
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Returnees: Ayam Kampong, In and Out (who both, incidentally, have joined as members). Was this copied from last week?
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Virgins: Nope
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Lipstick: CR, Comes Quietly, Bugle Boy, Pepe, F#*king Easy, even though he was a Hare, and Not Good Enough.
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Tits: Imperfect Member thought it was a great run and was appreciated by everyone. Everyone that is except Cock Radio, who went and did his own run at 5pm. Unappreciative gets the Tits.
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Dick: Wet ‘n Wild thinks that CR should also get the Dick, purely for being CR and being away for so long. Sounds like a lame dick charge to me.
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Banana Protector: Jack Off absent.
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Awards –Nope.
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AOB:
- Not Good Enough was sitting back at the reservoir having a romantic moment watching the sunset over the water. But his romantic moment was spoiled by Red Snapper, Two Jugs and 14 Penguins who refused to go and get him a beer.
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- Boo observed Give Way out in front with Not Good Enough after her. And what did he do when he caught up? Pinched her on the bum. Cheeky charge that one.
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- Not Tonight is after Loose Change, but she has left so gets another natural blonde look a like in, Red Snapper. Loose Change saw an orange lotus pull into the car park and exclaimed that Not Good Enough was driving it. On closer inspection, it turned out that it wasn’t Not Good Enough, but he did turn up later in an orange running singlet.
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- Kamala congratulates Give Way and Not Good Enough on becoming grandparents. Well done nan and pop.
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- Sneaky Comer saw the Hare trying to keep the Pack on track by giving directions at all the Checks, although some of Goes Down Easy’s clues seemed to be verging on the ridiculous and lacking an authorative stamp. However, she somehow got everyone back. Sneaky Comer asked her to impart some of her sense of direction skills onto Wet ‘n Wild, who still has difficulties finding her way back to the bedroom at night after going to the toilet.
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Bugle Boy tells how the Hares are celebrating a special anniversary. F#*king Easy asked Goes Down Easy if she had ever cheated. She replied candidly that she had cheated 3 times, but she did it for him.
First time was with the Banker to secure the house loan.
Second time was with the Doctor to pay for your cancer treatment.
F#*king Easy can understand why she did this and forgives her. Then he asks about the third time.
The third time was when Goes Down Easy needed 12 votes to become on sec of the Harriets.
Boom boom.
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- Boo then gets all the Anton Casey Brit look a likes in. They are all given a one way ticket to Perth, flying Scoot, and an MRT card to get the train to Changi. What a twat.
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On on to the On On.
Scribed by Cock Radio
Retirement:
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Stiffy, being a retired man, went into the Job Center in Orchard Rd, and saw a card advertising for a Gynecologist’s Assistant.
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Interested, he went in and asked the clerk for details.
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The clerk pulled up the file and read; “The job entails getting the ladies ready for the gynecologist. You have to help the women out of their underwear, lay them down and carefully wash their private regions, then apply shaving foam and gently shave off the hair, then rub in soothing oils so they’re ready for the gynecologist’s examination.”
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The clerk then commented that the annual salary is
$65,000, and that the job applicant would have to go to Johor Baru.”
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“Good grief; is that where the job is?” asked Stiffy.
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“No, sir — that is where the end of the line is right now.”
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(Just imagine a gynecologist’s assistant called Stiffy?)