Run Report #2126 26/02/2014

The Imperfect Pair of Jugs Run

Hares: Two Jugs and Imperfect Member.

Run Site: Labrador Park

On On: 99 Kitchen, South Buona Vista Rd

The Run:

We assembled at car park B, although some runners, including the Hares, tried car parks A, C, X, Y and Z. Check the map as usual. Especially if you are the Hare.

Goes Down Easy took off in a mad dash towards the toilet block in the park, taking Tiger Lily with her. Five males fell for their man trap and were destined for lipstick after only 100 metres.

Out to Labrador MRT, eventually heading up to Telok Blangah. Dragon Breath missed the short split and for the first time in her life did the long run, by mistake. Goes Down Easy was still sprinting like she needed to find a toilet urgently.

The ever reliable males, Comes Quietly, F#*ks Easy and Bugle Boy, kept some sanity in the lead group, although sanity was reduced with the appearance of Comes In Turd.

Sneaky Comer kept the midriff together, and was amply supported by Sunday visitors Krit and Ayam Zinking. Two notable absentees in this pack were the Kiwi ‘Walk and Talkers,’ Loose Marbles and Wet ‘n Wild.

Meanwhile, Not Good Enough kept his favourite position, up the rear, and together with Give Way, were the first to the drink stop. Ayam Kampong walked briskly admiring athletic bodies along the boardwalk.

The drink stop, on a boardwalk lookout over Kepell Bay, could be seen from the top of Mt. Faber, due to Imperfect Member and Suzee Wong (Drink Stop Master) wearing Boo’s bright orange National Day shirt. That was enough for Tiger Lily to head for Home, from the top of Mt. Faber, ignoring all resemblance of trail. How did Tiger Lily get home?

A wonderful setting for a drink stop. Except Not Good Enough and I were nearly hooked by a fisherman with a wayward cast.


The Circle:
Jack Off had everyone under control. And Croc Hunter had made friends with 3 policemen.


Crikey, so what did we think of that for a run? Too dry. Until the drink stop!


Tell us about your On On: Kitchen 99, 10 courses, $10. Sensational, thanks Hares.


Next Week’s Run: Belated Kiwi Run, Wet ‘n Wild, Loose Marbles – Blackmore Drive, on on Red Lantern. Will there be Herbal Chicken??


Guests: Bugle Boy, Julie, Ayam Zinking, Krit, Totally Unacceptable, Mati Hari, Dragon Breath, Foetus, Shipyard Flasher, Pooh Bag, Topless, Deep Throat.


Ayam Kampong. Comes In Turd (for coming in twenty turd).


Virgins: Yesss! Paul, Cindy.


Lipstick: Cock Radio, Ayam Zinking, Comes In Turd, Sneaky Comer.


Proceedings interrupted by a massive sort of fog horn sound. Stiffy owns up – ‘Indigestion.’ In and out calls ‘Going to starboard.’ Another cruise ship leaves Keppell Harbour. ‘Shooting Stars,’ calls Jack Off.


Tits: Two Jugs forgot she had a pair in demand.


Dick: Comes Quietly, for Gypsy, awards it to Goes Down Easy for setting a man trap out of the car park, using Topless and Dragon Breath as decoys.


Banana Protector: Father Anus , not here.


Awards – nope.



  • Sneaky Comer, after praising his wife the other week for finally having a sense of direction, calls in Wet ‘n Wild & Loose Marbles. Their direction finder failed miserably – they missed the drink stop.
  • Cock Radio kept Wet ‘n Wild & Loose Marbles in – they were seen sprinting from the beer van to the drink stop when they recognized their error.
  • Stiffy had a charge but I completely missed it. Sorry, please don’t sue.
  • Sneaky Comer told how the Hares put the pin in the wrong car park on the website map. But our webmaster takes the blame, as being a male he failed to check on the female Hares sense of direction.
  • Wet Brazilian charged the Hares anyway for getting the car park wrong.
  • Dragon Breath did the long run for the first time in her life. She charged Krit for his false instructions.
  • Goes Down Easy charged Krit also – he would not believe her about the on on location.
  • Dragon Breath was charged for exposing herself and Krit gave her $50. He then asked for $20 change.
  • Stiffy informed us that Adidas have withdrawn as sponsors of the World Cup – something to do with the girl in a g – string on the back being deemed offensive. Wet Brazilian takes the rap.
  • In and Out suggested the caption under the g string girl may have caused the problem ‘Come to Brazil if you want to score.’
  • The Boxer wonders what Pooh Bags real name is – Olive, Ping, Sleeping Beauty, or Joan? Who is she?
  • Cock Radio got in Sunday runners Dragon Breath, Krit and Ayam Zinking for producing a wonderful T Shirt with unique spelling – ‘FEBUARY’
  • Totally Unacceptable refers to the Budget. Price of alcohol to go up. Also no drinking in parks. And tonight we had 3 police question Croc Hunter on our motives. Croc Hunter offered them a drink and off they went.
  • Sweet Thighs Birthday cake is presented to the tune of ‘Who ate all the cake…’


On on to the On On.

Scribed by Cock Radio


A Scottish woman goes to the local newspaper office to see that the obituary for her recently deceased Husband is published.

The obit editor informs her that there is a charge of 50 cents per word.

She pauses, reflects, and then she says, “Well, then, let it read, ‘Angus MacPherson died’.”

Amused at the woman’s thrift, the editor tells her that there is a seven word minimum for all obituaries.

She thinks it over and in a few seconds says, “In that case, let it read…….

‘Angus MacPherson died. Golf clubs for sale’.”

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